Dispatch: Overheard on the LIRR; Midsummer Night Drinks; and the Brinkley Brood in SoFo

June 20, 2012 | Talk of the Town

Tony Ingrao and Margaret Russell at God's Love We Deliver Midsummer Night Drinks

Overheard on the LIRR
The armies of fresh-faced summer sharers that invade the Main Streets of the various Hamptons hamlets each summer never fail to entertain. On the LIRR Saturday morning, my car was filled with young sorority types whose entire vocabulary seemed to have been borrowed from a Gossip Girl script. Every third word was "seriously," "obviously," "totally," "like," "exactly," "absolutely," or "OMG." And the cadence of speech was so slow that each letter seemed to have extra syllables. Their voices cracked as they attempted to add extra inflections to every sound. In the seat behind me, the young women were dissing a Debbie Downer housemate, who would apparently always discuss being so tired when she wakes up after drinking and sleeping only two hours. (Seriously? That was totally her choice, right?)

Midsummer Night Drinks
That night, God's Love We Deliver held its elegant Midsummer Night Drinks at Woodhouse Park, the East Hampton home of Tony Ingrao and Randy Kemper. Stellar choice. Dispatches had visited before, but the exquisite gardens rolled and curved on and on with follies and statues for what seemed like three-quarters of a mile. Apparently, Ingrao and Kemper have added two lots. “Now we’re just refining,” said Kemper. “We’ve gotten it down to where we only have two people working here. One is a tree guy, and one takes care of the lawns and weeding.” This garden is a waking dream. Seriously!

Sailor Brinkley Cook, Christie Brinkley, Alexa Ray Joel, and Jack Brinkley Cook at SoFo Goes SoHo

SoFo Goes SoHo
And speaking of acreage, SoHo Meets SoFo was the theme of the South Fork Natural History Museum fête on the museum's bucolic 800 acres. Christie Brinkley brought her children, Sailor and Jack, who are now as tall as or taller than the also present Alexa Ray Joel. Bites included shrimp cocktail in little glasses and tiny passed lobster rolls. Brinkley’s eponymous line of organic skin care products made the gift bag.

Around Town
On Shelter Island, Olympic runners Frank Shorter and Joan Benoit Samuelson helped to pace the annual 10K. My wife, on her birthday, came in third for her new age group; and then we stayed on the island for dinner at a friend’s idyllic house.  

Meanwhile, Kelly "I Can Make You Hot” Killoren Bensimon hit Banzai Burger in Amagansett and ended up jumping behind the counter to make vegetarian rolls with Japanese chef Isao. But ultimately, she just ended up downing a draft PBR and a cheeseburger.

And on Father's Day, Dispatches dined at Duryea's—you can’t beat the views—and took the train back from Montauk at 7:30 PM, following the spectacular sunset from Montauk to Bridgehampton. On this train ride, I overheard loud but witty runners who amused me. One told a story of staying out late, not eating dinner, drinking, and then getting up for a spin class to meet a friend. Halfway through the class, he lost his vision and then blacked out—but not before knocking over the water cooler.  Another gal spoke of ho-hum sex with a new partner who had stepped up his game in the sack over the past weekend. "What do you mean?" asked her male buddies. “More dominant . . . less wimpy,” she answered.

Sensitive types need not apply.

—JEFFREY SLONIM

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